I grew up as a pastor’s kid. My brothers and I led worship with my mom from a young age. When I went away to college, I was self-righteous and prideful as I had been a very likeable, successful, and moral person who shared my faith freely.

However, it is true that pride comes before the fall. I became a prodigal as I lost my way and relationship with God. I remember thinking I wanted to get back to Jesus, but didn’t know how. I felt as though I was grasping for the wind. It was almost six years later and many prayers to God by my mom that I began reading my Bible and really sought to know God again. It was then that I began to take hold and grasp Jesus, WHO He is, and the desperate need we have for a Savior. I had always believed, but I was such a “good church going and moral” person, that I didn’t grasp Salvation as I do today.

As a pastor’s kid, I was exposed to a 360° view of the church and THE Church. I am completely aware of the concept of wolves and sheep, and wolves in sheep’s clothing. After I got married and as I returned to a walk with God, I had determined to stay away from ministry because I understood ministry to be a detriment to marriage and families. After a night of singing alone in my home with just my husband and I, I heard in the depths of my heart that this is what God was calling me to do. “Lord, if I do this, it will destroy my marriage.” He spoke clearly to my heart, “If you honor me in this, I will honor you in your marriage.” That is when my husband and I committed to Jesus that we would worship Him and lead others to do so when He gave us the opportunity.

I attempted to run a marathon a few years ago, but quit when I couldn’t run more than 10 miles without serious pain. I decided to run a half-marathon in order to raise awareness and money for a medical clinic we are opening with FACE of Harvest. As a new runner, I have learned that being a runner means you grapple with constant injuries and pain, extended days of rest when you want to run, and having to run when you want to rest. If I choose to stop running altogether, I won’t experience the pains of running. However, if I am to be a runner, I cannot QUIT running. There is a point on a long run where a sort of euphoric feeling comes over you and you think you can run forever. Then comes the point where you think you can’t go another step, when the body shuts down, you can’t turn it back on. However, to be a runner, you still have to run.

I see my walk with Jesus in the same way. If we are Christians, we are going go run this race with endurance. We cannot just decide to stop running. The circumstances that come about as a result of following Jesus: good or bad, gain or loss, life or death, heartbreak or healing, emotional injury and sometimes physical injury – these should not have a bearing on whether we trust God or NOT, nor whether we run or stop running. God is the ONLY one we CAN trust and He is definitely worthy of that honor in our lives. This is what I have learned being surrendered to Him is dependent upon. There is a point where you think can run your spiritual race forever but then comes a point where you feel you can’t run anymore. This is when we know we are moving in our own strength but we MUST draw on the strength of God’s Spirit and not our own. He is teaching us to trust Him. If we trust in God and wait upon Him and we DON’T QUIT, He will give us HIS strength. We will NEVER “weary in doing good.”

In the same way, as Christians we’ll experience joy and pain inside and outside the doors of a church building. However, there is a REMNANT of believers who are surrendered and are running this race with endurance. Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling… let’s you and I be that Remnant: those surrendered faithful souls that God looks to and fro to find on this earth. Let’s respond to His Love, His Call on our lives, and we will be THE CHURCH: His hands and feet in this world. The task could be just going to work each day and being open to make the most of every opportunity in that day or traveling half-way across the world to help the remnant open a clinic in a small village.

Jesus gave the example of the shepherd going out to find the ONE lost sheep and leaving the 99. Let’s go find the lost sheep. They, too, are the remnant that will be His hands and feet. They are in your sphere and mine. RUN.

The song "Only You, Jesus."

A lot happened before, during, and after writing this song. I was sitting at the piano and asking the Lord for a song that I could worship Him with... a chorus I could sit there and sing over and over. I had been reading John 6:53-69- Jesus had just finished telling the crowd that they needed to eat of his flesh and drink of His blood. We now understand He was making a point. When the crowds and Jesus' disciples turned away because it was "too hard a teaching", Jesus turned to the 12 Disciples who were still there and asked if they were going to leave too. Simon Peter's response was so beautiful, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life! We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God."

It's true. Where can we go? ...BUT TO THE only one who really knows about life and death, who really loved us enough to give up His own life for ours.

The very day I wrote this song, my 4-year old niece faced death by the ropes of the window blinds. She said, "Jesus made me think. He didn't want me to die. He said, "Rope around your neck, rope around your neck!" and so I took it off." My little niece, Selah, would carry the scars of that incident for awhile, but she knew that Jesus had saved her. The day after that incident, my mother, her grandmother, caught her alone in her room, on her knees, praying out loud, saying, "Jesus, thank you for saving my life, thank you for saving my life." Dear ones, I do believe she saw Jesus that day.

That very week, my friend, Brigitta was going into surgery to have a brain tumor removed. We prayed, and God brought her through the surgery. She is still battling cancer but we are seeing little miracles in her life and progress. When it seems that things aren't going our way in terms of results, the question remains, "Lord, who else can we turn to? Who else has the words of life?"

This song is very close to me as I love these two individuals very much. We can worship God through our joys and our trials. There is no where else to run. When we do praise Him and worship Him through all circumstances, you can feel Him carrying you. I can't explain it outside of that... you need to walk through it yourself to completely understand. Surrender to Him today... only then, can you know, 'it's ONLY YOU, Jesus'. I pray the song blesses your heart and gives you a song to sing!

-elva

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